Monday, August 3, 2009

Universal Appeal II: FRANKENSTEIN!

James Whale’s Frankenstein still stands as a classic in both its……ugh I’m going to stop there. Why bother? You know this movie is a great gothic masterpiece. People have been talking about this movie for nearly eighty years. I’m going to skip to the pictures and the Universal Appeal index.

Every film needs to begin with a disclaimer announcing that what you’re about to see may #*&$ your &#!% up.

What should we put on Grandpa’s marker? A sunset? A bass? A tractor? How bouts we get him a giant scary grim reaper statue instead?

“I speak with a 100% certainty when I say my scheme to defy nature and build a freakish looking super-strong giant would have been completely successful if my idiot assistant had gotten the correct brain.

Baron Frankenstein as played by Frederick Kerr is one of the greatest harrumphers to ever harrumph a harrumph.

How amazing would it have been to see that for the first time? Still the greatest film make up design of all time. Don't believe me? Name something better.

Nothing funny here. Great shot of a great set

How abnormal does your brain have to be to not realize a seven year old child weighs more than a flower?

Now it's time for the Busch Gardens Sausage Grasping Dance!

In retrospect, the villagers probably shouldn't have burnt down that windmill. It probably provided a lot of food.

Universal Appeal: Strong. A little slow to modern audiences and its supporting players a little stodgy (with the exception of the Baron) but this one gets high appeal for maintaining its iconic atmosphere. Dracula quickly becomes everything modern viewers hate about old movies but most of Frankenstein would still be recognizable as a movie to audiences familiar with Tim Burton and his imitators. When judging the appeal to modern audiences it’s important to realize they have much more in common with fairy tales and The Corpse Bride than a modern viewer’s idea of horror.

Is too much to hope for a day when Frankensteins are more popular than vampires? Where kids wear neck electrodes to Anime club instead of fangs?

“Parent and town not understand me either. I take you away from all this. Me dangerous yet completely non-threatening. Popular girls and fire no bother us anymore!”

1 comment:

  1. Funny post. And, yeah, they probably regretted burning that windmill. :)